Dissecting our own emotional intelligence

I recently became acquainted with the term “emotional intelligence” and became sickly fascinated with the context behind it. It is defined as “the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups.” What it really boils down to an innate ability to pickup on context clues that help you read a situation, immediately dissect and act accordingly. Fascinating yes, there is an actual term for it but this was something I had known all along. You can be the most beautiful, talented and book smart individual on earth but without that ability to channel that charisma and feed off the energy of others, it is futile. It is even more fascinating to observe how that concept is perceived by both sexes, as well as the misconceptions it can spawn. For instance, a friend recently gave me some positive advice about airing out my emotional state via social networking. It got me thinking, why is it detrimental to a woman’s image to waiver from strength yet men are able to air annoyance without question. Granted if I saw a dude getting emo online I’d draw the conclusion that he was either a pussy or in the throes of deep despair. I was reminded of the time Hilary Clinton shed a tear in frustration and how highly scrutinized that was. Is a protection of our emotional intelligence making us a numb society? We shun expressing emotions yet are the first to cry “let it out in the open” when some spoiled D list celebrity wants to whine about their self-induced peril. I guess everyone has their preference for disclosure but we have to realize that it’s always going to be shaped by our personal perceptions and upbringing. As much as America wants to glorify this fantasy of true equality across sexes and races every person is a byproduct of the environment they were brought up in. Honing in on those weakness will improve your emotional intelligence. Identifying your personal prejudices and opening  a candid dialogue internally will also gain you some ground. It’s allowing emotion to flood in without reacting emotionally that is the key factor to high emotional intelligence. Much easier said than done but I’m trying harder to listen within, crack a smile and react accordingly. Sharpening your emotional intelligence can only bring you peace, sensibility and a more refined contented existence – be aware of it!

We never learn from our mistakes 😉


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