We can learn to be still but we will always be broken

The first season of GIRLS took me awhile to get into. Sorry, I know nothing about a privileged life where my parents would even throw me a fishing line for monetary support of my artistic career. Frankly it struck me as super white bread and reflective of the problems a more upper-middle class version of an artistic nutcase like myself would have encountered. Being from the NYC area all my life I could relate to the asshole fashion, party life and casual sex aspect of the stories which of course drew me in almost to a whimsical level. Despite my mixed feelings I gave the second season a try and was excited to see the progression both the writing and subsequent character development the show had underwent. Lena Dunham is one ballsy, inspiring woman on so many different levels. She’s not a 10, definitely a bit overweight and has one of the weirdest, undecipherable tattoos I’ve seen on TV in some time – not the criteria for fantasy TV land success. What she represents however, is how much unbridled confidence and wit can empower a woman of any standing. Constantly naked, sometimes to a stomach turning level, she openly bears her imperfection and in some respect has opened an uncomfortable door to a rarely openly admitted bias many of us hold about traditional “beauty.”

Physical attractiveness is held at such a high open regard in mainstream media, pigeonholing curvier actors and actresses to jovial and quirky roles. Never, ever could a chubby girl be a temptress or openly sexual, it just wouldn’t happen.  The truth is some of the sauciest and most promiscuous women I have known have been lackluster in the looks department and a little, if not considerably overweight. Behavior knows no boundaries and when you look at it objectively, reality will manifest itself that way no matter what. Cue in Dunham who is obviously a crafty writer and visionary. Her self-awareness is something I haven’t seen in a character in quite some time and something I as a woman of imperfection can relate heavily to. It took me until the last episode to really understand how amazing the writing is and perhaps it was in self-identification that I was able to cement this love. Reading most of the reviews, so many critics were appalled at the fantasy of the “pretty in pink-ish” scenario Hannah (Dunam’s character) found herself in but at this point I have found myself expectant of those weird, sensational plot twists in any series. Welcome to television. The part that took me for a loop and opened up a dialogue within myself was her revelation at wanting to “experience all feelings to tell stories” – so brilliant. Pop culture and social media has left us a sounding board for opinions but the minute we attach a feeling to it, we’ve crossed the line. Expression is almost shunned upon unless it fits the appropriate mold and channel. As someone who has always enjoyed the moment and learned from every experience, good or bad, I can definitely relate to this one-of-a-kind feeling. When you take on the self-inflicted burden of absorbing the world, interpreting it and dissecting every piece of it, you’re left with almost an empty glass to fill. In my life I have met many amazing people, some much smarter and more proficient than me who I highly respect, but very few who were as emotionally honest with themselves and who can see it all without reaction. Every word of that dialogue at the end of the episode was a snapshot into my personal peril, certainly something I have not seen in a series or identified with in so long. Navigating the catacombs of our minds can be one of the greatest feats, one we often battle alone. In a world that extracts fake emotion and frowns upon exposing true weakness, it was glorious to see a character who just like me felt good to believe, in something.

EW was not as thrilled: http://tvrecaps.ew.com/recap/girls-recap-season-2-episode-5/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+entertainmentweekly%2Ftvwatch+%28Entertainment+Weekly%3A+TV+Watch%29

Also, they need to have Twin Shadow on already, he’s my hipster crush. DOMINICANO!


2 thoughts on “We can learn to be still but we will always be broken

  1. I someone who knows not of the show you are describing but am still truly moved by the eloquence that you describe it. The mainstream marketing machine may call you imperfect, but it’s those imperfections that I think make you perfect. I understand that I don’t know you, but I am someone who listens to you every day and what I appreciate about you the most is your unwillingness to be anything or anyone other than yourself. It is truly admirable, truly beautiful and truly sexy. Don’t ever change from who you are, because this world is a little worse without you.

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