It has taken me 30 years to understand the mixed up depth of what exactly going on inside the cavity that carries me but I’m finally getting it down. Things are really fucking complicated inside me. I remember being young and having my mind blown by how unattached to emotion some people could be, when you’re a passion fiend like myself it’s incomprehensible that people would act solely based on logic. See for me, emotion shapes my logic, if you don’t feel it why bother? A few major mistakes in life can probably be attributed to following my heart and not logic. Sue me, I used to believe. Emotion is somewhat of a beautiful anomaly and when you learn that it isn’t always correct or productive, it hits you like a ton of bricks. Achieving that balance of conscious without being crazy is a lifelong struggle for most.
On the flip side (see what I did there), some people let emotions overpower them to the point of lunacy. We’ve all seen drama queens, some in unexpected clothing, bring down someone’s entire world. I’ve definitely had periods of momentary insanity induced by overwhelming emotion. Mostly in my youth because I (like many) was passionate and foolish, but there is almost a high from understanding the depth of your emotion. A high I see way too many people indulging in on a regular basis, they crave that emotional crack. I’m not even talking relationships…when someone is ready to unleash the crazy, it can manifest itself anywhere, at any time.
Riding on the other side of the spectrum is a breed of human I personally cannot comprehend: the waking stone. Driven by selfish motives they are able to forego emotion and manipulate anything to determine the outcome. In some bizarre ways I am actually jealous of these kinds of people and feel I could benefit from being more of a cold hearted bitch. These types will change direction at the drop of a hat for benefit, even betray to get what they desire. They are the prototypical wolf in sheeps clothing and in business they arise frequently. As much as I admire their detachment abilities, I wouldn’t trade my emotional intelligence for the world. Yes, it leaves you susceptible to attack, but even possessing that vulnerability is something not everyone can do.
Moving into a new season, a new time in life, it’s hard not to address life priorities. Does your motivation lie in an emotional or logical place? Are your emotions drawn out by you or the actions/reactions of others? Extremes at either side of the spectrum are dangerous and “long-term” reality is always a day away. Take a crack at the side you least explore and dive in.